When my kids were young, there was one expression that they would say that would irk me more than any others: “I don’t care.” I fully accept that, at times, we can all be indifferent to certain options, but “not caring”? These two words should never be put together.

Please read the following excerpt from Daisy Grewal’s article “How Wealth Reduces Compassion: As riches grow, empathy for others seems to decline,” published in Scientific American on April 10, 2012.

“Who is more likely to lie, cheat, and steal – the poor person or the rich one? It’s tempting to think that the wealthier you are, the more likely you are to act fairly. After all, if you already have enough for yourself, it’s easier to think about what others may need. But research suggests the opposite is true: as people climb the social ladder, their compassionate feelings towards other people decline.”

Published over a decade ago, this article has continued to have an impact on me over the past many years. It would have been my professional and personal anecdotal experience at our school, for example, that the overwhelming majority of students, parents and staff have proven to be thoughtful, caring and compassionate. I have myriad examples that demonstrate this.

That said, I believe a heightened sense of vigilance is important to ensure that we do not take for granted our good fortune. Most importantly, we want our kids to recognize their good fortune, too, and to pay respect for their good circumstances through words and deeds that benefit others. Working thoughtfully and diligently, helping others, appreciating those around them – these principles would be the expectation. Entitlement is the enemy.

So how should care and compassion manifest itself on a daily basis for kids?

At TCS we reinforce some of the foundational aspects of these values. I am sure you do too. It starts with simple acts of kindness. We ask our students to:

• Say “please” and “thank you” to everyone
• Hold doors open for others
• Advocate for yourself and others
• Focus more on the people around you than those on your cell phone
• Engage in meaningful service at school and outside of the School

I’ll leave you with another quote from Daisy Grewal’s article: “The less we have to rely on others, the less we may care about their feelings. This leads us towards being more self-focused.”

Growing up within a caring, active community where participation and engagement are required, provides kids with a sense of place, connection, responsibility and gratitude for friendship and mentorship, coaching and learning; they develop an appreciation for, and reliance on, one another.

We have long heard that “it takes a village to raise a child.” I would suggest that it also takes a child to fully engage in the village in order to best learn the important, foundational practices of kindness, caring and compassion.